GodDAMN it, Monday
So, I’ve got some new servers coming into work. I LOVE new servers. I love unwrapping them, setting them up, giving them hostnames, etc. However, I have no place to put them, so I order a 4 post rack. This isn’t my first foray into ordering and setting up racks. With all the IT infrastructure migration I have on my resume, this is actually a boring procedure. You order the rack, get absolutely screwed on shipping (cause racks are damn heavy), and then you get to decipher ancient hieroglyphics as to how to put the thing together just so you can pop a few servers in.
Today the rack arrived, and I started the task of sorting the parts into piles, occasionally referencing the aforementioned hieroglyphics. Turns out I am short some hardware. No big deal, right? You just call the company that makes the rack and tell em what you need. Couple of problems with this, as I found out today.
1. Their number is busy, or you reach them at “off” (read: extra special handjob happy time) hours.
2. When you do finally reach a real person, let’s call her…Peggy, you find out that her thick Slavic accent is so horrible you can’t tell if she’s jotting down what you are saying or telling you to go blow yourself.
3. Peggy also has a neat trick where she reads what should have been in your box to you, but IT COMPLETELY DIFFERS from the list you have on your hieroglyphic sheet. I don’t mean different things, they are just called by different names. For example:
Peggy: You should have 12 cross screws for arm supports, yes?
Me: (Reading list, finding an item that only says “Arm screws”) I think so.
Imagine going through a 15 point bulleted list, with the previously mentioned Slavic accent cursing and spitting at you the entire time. No shit, I thought she was going to say “No….I expect you to DIE!” and then hang up, cackling.
4. Once you finally get through all of this, you find out that this is a problem they are having with this specific model, and they can either offer a return (in which YOU will pay for shipping of course), or you can get on a waiting list for 3 weeks to get this hardware shipped to you.
5. After hanging up, you realize the last time you bought one of these racks you went through something similar, so you just went to a hardware store and bought some nuts and bolts.
Just….just fuck today. Right in the face. I’m gonna be at the Home Depot, and then I’m hitting the liquor store.
